"The grief is the same at any stage” - Boston mum urges people to talk about baby loss
Sophie Stringer lost her son at 23 weeks and says families shouldn’t feel alone in their grief
A Boston mum who lost her baby at 23 weeks is urging people to be brave and start conversations about pregnancy loss during Baby Loss Awareness Week.
Sophie Stringer and her partner made the devastating decision to terminate her pregnancy for medical reasons in 2021 after their son, Luka, was found to be seriously ill.
She said support from charities and bereavement teams helped her through her grief:
“The support is one of the most important things. It takes an unbearable grief and turns it into a survivable grief.”
Since then, Sophie has raised more than £20,000 for local baby loss charities, helping to fund bereavement facilities at Pilgrim Hospital, cuddle cots and specialist training for staff.
She said she now wants to encourage more open conversations so that families don’t feel isolated:
“People don’t know what to say around the subject, so people just choose not to say anything at all.
"But there are people that want to talk about it. They want their baby to be heard, to be remembered. That’s definitely me.”
Sophie also welcomed forthcoming changes to the law, which will extend statutory bereavement leave to cover losses at any stage of pregnancy. She missed out by just one week, as the current entitlement only begins at 24 weeks.
“Going through that at 23 weeks, to know that bereavement leave wasn’t available was just crazy," said Sophie.
"I had to give birth to my little boy and he was a baby. That wouldn’t be any different later on in pregnancy.”
"Grief is the same no matter what stage of pregnancy - every family has lost a very wanted baby.”
This weekend Sophie joined events in Lincoln and Boston marking Baby Loss Awareness Week, including a lantern walk at Lincoln Cathedral.
“It never goes away. You just have to learn to build your life around it. For me, that’s kind of creating a legacy for my little boy.”