Army major took own life after suffering stress over work-life balance, inquest hears
Major Nick Coles was found dead at his home in Andover last August.
An Army major took his own life after fearing that seeking help for work stress and the pressures of fatherhood would "blight" his military career, an inquest heard.
Nick Coles, who served with the Black Watch, 3rd Battalion, Royal Regiment of Scotland, was found dead by his wife, Tabitha, in the garage of his home in Andover in the early hours of August 4 2023.
The Portsmouth inquest heard that he had been drinking wine with his wife during the evening and had a blood alcohol level similar to the drink-drive limit.
Mrs Coles told the hearing that her husband was dyslexic and found it difficult to cope with reading and writing work, which she said slowed him down and meant that he struggled balancing his work and spending time with their baby daughter.
She said: "He was always trying to do as much with her as possible, he found balancing that difficult, he would be leaving the office and it was seven o'clock and she would be going to bed, he was trying to squeeze everything in at once."
Mrs Coles described her husband, who had previously served in Inverness, Scotland, as a "perfectionist" who worked 16-hour days but said he intended to leave the Army after completing a period of deployment, preferably in Kenya.
She said that her husband had difficulty sleeping and would catch up with sleep at the weekend which meant missing time with their daughter, leading him to suffer panic attacks in the morning when he had to go back to work.
Mrs Coles said: "I think he felt ashamed of it."
She added that in the six months preceding his death, her husband also appeared to have stopped exercising and would have violent verbal outbursts which would upset their daughter.
She said: "It was powerful, explosive and scary and it would be about something little. He would feel even more terrible because he had upset her."
Recording a conclusion of suicide, coroner Jason Pegg said that he believed Mr Coles had acted "impulsively" and the wine he had drunk had contributed to this.
He said: "Nick was someone who had achieved his rank and role through pacing demands on himself through Sandhurst and elsewhere and had high expectations of himself but like so many, he did not achieve those high expectations.
"Nick was someone who often placed himself under pressure to do well, including at school and even at school Nick would suffer from panic attacks when he felt stressed.
"Nick was prone to these panic attacks and it's with great sadness when I heard of him being comforted by Mrs Coles on a daily basis to get off to work and such trait may be not best suited for someone who is an Army officer, and Nick recognised that."
He added: "Nick was finding it very difficult to balance the various stresses in his life, work and also balancing being a husband and a father to a young daughter.
"There was a reluctance on Nick's part to seek professional help, he felt it might blight his career."