Middlesbrough woman shares her experience of overdosing, to encourage other drug users to seek help
A woman from Middlesbrough's been sharing her story - of drug overdose - in the hopes of raising awareness of the support that's available for people in the same position.
A woman from Middlesbrough's been sharing her story - of drug overdose - in the hopes of raising awareness of the support that's available for people in the same position.
Laura - whose name has been changed - said she had a good job, nice house and matching nails - but was still taking a cocktail of pills, crack cocaine and heroin by the time she overdosed.
Laura is sharing her story this Overdose Awareness Day as councils across Teesside take the opportunity to promote their support services.
"It sounds silly looking back, but I loved the hedonistic lifestyle. One thing just led to another really.
"At the time of my overdose, I was using crack, tablets and heroin (always smoked, never injected).
"Although addiction controlled some parts of my life, I always worked. I even moved away for a job in the music business.
"I had a home, the bills were kept on top of. I’d always have matching nails and make up.
"One day I was in hospital for a simple procedure unrelated to my drug use.
"I’d taken my methadone dose earlier that day, 50ml, but I didn’t mention it to any of the nursing team. I just didn’t think to mention it. I was discharged and went home to score.
"I went downstairs to make a cuppa and use. I was walking back through the lounge when I noticed the tea was moving about in the cup. The tea was like a rough sea, my hand felt still but all I was aware of was the tea moving.
"The next thing, I flatlined and overdosed. Paramedics arrived to work on me in the lounge. I remember coming round and my brother-in-law was stood in the doorway, his facial expressions were off, and the colour had drained from his face – I can still see his face to this day.
"Back in hospital I just wanted to score, that was my priority. I was worried about telling hospital staff about picking up my methadone, as I felt ashamed.
"I got asked often why I was wriggling around but I felt ashamed of admitting I was rattling. I was in hospital for two days; my body wasn’t in a great place. I wasn’t bothered when I came round, I just wanted to score again. I didn’t care.
"The change came a couple of years later, when I had an appointment at my local drug and alcohol services and I remember my sister rang, asking if I wanted a coffee, which was weird.
"My addiction wasn’t openly spoken about and was swept under the carpet. It was only when I went to rehab, my mum looked online about addiction, and we started speaking about it more. My family had no idea how much or how often I was using.
"I attended my appointment but scored with a friend on the way home. My sister, brother-in-law, son, partner and mum were all at my house when I got back.
"They were visibly upset and crying but I didn’t care and just wanted them to leave. After what felt like forever, everybody left, and my partner went to bed. I was using in silence and darkness when I realised ‘the game was up’.
"Everyone knew exactly what was going on and I knew I couldn’t get away with it anymore. That’s when I realised things had to change.
"Now in recovery, on reflection I understand I might not have come round. But it’s only since I’ve been in recovery since I’ve felt this way.
"I fully understand why people who overdose and have had naloxone given that they just want to go out and score again, as they’ve been put into withdrawal. We have no idea of how they’ve afforded to get high, and naloxone undoes it all.
"Now – I feel a sense of freedom. It’s the best feeling in the world.
"On a morning, I can lie there if I want to, have a coffee. There’s no need to throw the quilt back and start the process: money, call the dealer, get dressed, feel horrendous, is the dealer going to take long? All of that was pressure.
"My norm now is slower mornings: what shall I wear? What should I do? But it’s only since I’ve been in recovery since I’ve felt this way.
"I often think back to that day. My tea must’ve spilt everywhere. I don’t remember hitting the ground but do remember the tea wobbling and the feeling like I was going.
"My brain switched off but I’m in a much better place now."
Anyone in Hartlepool who needs help with substance misuse issues can contact START on 01429 285000 or online.
In Middlesbrough contact Recovery Solutions on 01642 726800 or online.
In Redcar and Cleveland, people who need support with substance misuse issues can contact We Are With you on 0300 303 3781 or online |newtab).
And in Stockton; Change Grow Live on 01642673888 or online. |newtab)