Romance fraud warning in Surrey this Valentine’s
Surrey Police are urging people to be extra careful with online relationships this Valentine’s Day, after a sharp rise in romance fraud reports across the county.
Between October 2023 and September 2024, there were 218 reports of romance fraud in Surrey. In 160 of those cases, victims lost money – on average about £19,800 each.
Victims are almost evenly split between men and women, and many are over 50.
Police say they’re seeing more:
- Sextortion – threats to share intimate images unless you pay
- Celebrity impersonation– scammers pretending to be famous or high‑status people
How romance fraud works
Romance scammers:
- Start a relationship online and sound genuine
- Build up trust over time
- Then invent a crisis and ask you for money, gifts or help with “urgent” problems
- Try to isolate you from friends and family
They usually:
- Contact you through dating apps and social media
- Try to move the chat to WhatsApp, Telegram or email
- Avoid video calls or meeting in person
- Share photos that may be stolen or AI generated
Ask for:
- bank transfers
- “investment” money
- Gift cards (Amazon, iTunes, etc.)
- to use your bank account or address for parcels (this can be money laundering, which is illegal)
If they threaten to share intimate pictures or videos unless you pay, that is sextortion and a crime.
Romance fraud is one of the most prevalent fraud types we see in Surrey, particularly affecting vulnerable people. It’s right up there, it increases year on year, and some of the impact on victims is just utterly devastating,” said Bernadette Lawrie, from Surrey Police’s fraud team.
She added: “What we’re seeing locally is a slight change in the modus operandi. Traditionally, when we talk about romance fraud, we’re talking about online dating – you meet somebody on a dating site or app, you get chatting, they move you off that platform, they groom you over a period of time and lead you to believe that you’re in a relationship with them."
"Typically, you never meet this person in real life." She said.
“A second form we see is what we call in‑person romance fraud, where you are in a relationship and they are a real person – but they are a fraudster and they’re there purely to take your money."
"Again, it’s equally devastating. Victims talk about a feeling of bereavement, particularly in cases where they’ve been in love with somebody who turns out to be someone they didn’t know at all."
“The one we’re seeing really topically at the moment is what we call celebrity impersonation romance fraud." Explained Bernadette.
"This is a much newer fraud type within the romance fraud bracket. The frauds I’ve already talked about tend to target males and females in roughly equal measure. What we see with the celebrity scams is a much higher percentage of female victims."
“Typically, it involves very well‑known celebrities – people like Keanu Reeves, Kevin Costner, Elon Musk – and some lesser‑known names too. Victims might be chatting to them on something like Facebook, following them on social media."
Warning signs to look out for
Be cautious if:
- They say they love you or talk about a future together very quickly
- They share emotional stories but give little you can check about their real life
- They always have an excuse not to meet in person
- They ask you to keep the relationship secret
- They push you to act fast to send money, gifts or invest in something
- They get upset, guilty or angry when you question them or tell friends and family
What to do if you’re worried
Talk to someone you trust
Tell a friend or family member what’s going on. It can help you see things more clearly.
Don’t send money or personal details
Don’t:
- transfer money
- take out loans or credit for them
- buy gift cards
- send or receive parcels on their behalf
If you’ve already paid, contact your bank
Call 159 to reach your bank’s fraud team, or use the number on the back of your card. Explain what happened as soon as you can. If you’re being threatened with intimate images
- Don’t pay – it often leads to more demands
- Save screenshots and messages
- Report it to the police
Call 999 in an emergency
Remember: romance fraud is never the victim’s fault.
Getting support - romance fraud can be very upsetting as well as costly.
You can contact Victim Support for free, confidential help, whether or not you’ve told the police:
Visit their website
Or call the 24/7 Supportline: 0808 168 9111
If you’re worried someone you know might be a victim, there are guides online (for example from the Online Dating & Discovery Association) to help you support them.
If something doesn’t feel right in an online relationship: pause, talk to someone, and check before you pay.