Camberley man jailed after abuse of partner left them fearing for their life
The victim was made too feel as if she was his property and anything he said had to be obeyed
A Surrey man has been jailed after being convicted of Coercive and Controlling Behaviour, following prolonged abuse that left the victim worried for her life.
In a statement released today, Kingsley Stembridge's victim said:
"When I first reported what Kingsley had done to me, I never thought I’d be strong enough to go against him in court. I went back and forth on the idea for months. But overtime the hold that an abuser has on you starts to wear off. You start to see life without the tinted glasses they made you see it through.
He once had me in a complete bubble with him. I believed this was a person I would be with forever, but I now know these are the effects of a narcissistic abuser. I was obviously blindsided by love. I think there was also a part of me that was scared of how I would live without him. There's no denying I would have done just about anything for him. I had lost everyone close to me as a result of him completely isolating me by controlling who I was allowed to interact with. I felt like I was his property and anything he said had to be obeyed. I was gaslit into thinking this was the way to be treated by someone who says they love you.
The abuse was so gradual that I didn't even realise the gravity of it until it got to the point I thought my life could be at risk. Kingsley was a boxer and he would tell me the things he had done to people - I was so scared and knew that I'd have no chance against him."
After denying accountability, Stembridge, 30, from Camberley, was convicted of Coercive and Controlling Behaviour, sending malicious messages and criminal damage and was sentenced to 30 months' imprisonment at Chichester Crown Court on 11 April.
He was also given a 15-year restraining order against her and her family.
Bravely telling her story, the survivor of Kingsley Stembridge's abuse said: "There are so many victims that stay quiet about domestic abuse as it’s such a difficult topic. You are made to feel like you deserve the things that are being done to you.
"I won't deny that the process was challenging. I had never been to court before and hadn't seen Kingsley since the last time he abused me and I had to run away. Emotionally, I had to relive everything which was really hard, but when I saw the evidence of what he had done to me, I thought the young girl (me) in those photos and videos didn't deserve what was being done to her. With support from friends and family it gave me the fight I needed to keep going.
I feel proud to have protected future victims from this one individual. I'm grateful justice was served and I hope that I have set an example to other people in a similar position to what I was in."
PC Charlotte Cripps, who investigated the case, said: "This has been a long and complex investigation, and I commend the bravery and resilience of the survivor in this case. There is no doubt that it was difficult for her to speak with Police about the abuse she had been enduring but her determination resulted in the defendant finally having to face accountability for what he had done. She and her family are now safe; however, we know that there are many others out there who are facing abuse and violence, and I hope that this account shows that you will always be taken seriously.
"We urge anyone who may be the victim of domestic abuse to come forward. You will be believed and you will be supported. If you aren’t ready to speak to us, reach out to one of our brilliant Surrey-based charities who can offer sanctuary and practical, as well as emotional, support.”