“I thought I was going to die”: Ipswich mum speaks out on birth trauma
More than 150,000 people have backed a petition calling for a national maternity commissioner, following a parliamentary inquiry into birth trauma.
A mother from Ipswich has spoken about the lasting impact of birth trauma, as MPs debate calls for major reforms to maternity care across the UK.
Melanie Paul, who gave birth to her daughter in June 2024, said what should have been a positive experience left her fearing for her life.
“I thought I was going to die from it,” she said.
Her story comes as more than 150,000 people have backed a petition calling for a national maternity commissioner, following a parliamentary inquiry into birth trauma.
“The focus became my BMI, not me”
Melanie said her pregnancy was largely straightforward, aside from severe sickness, but she felt the clinical focus on her BMI shaped the care she received.
She said it became the “be all and end all”, taking away from more personalised support, and what she wanted for the birth, including being all natural, and not breastfeeding.
"I'm going to either leave a baby or the baby doesn't survive."
Melanie said she felt unprepared for how quickly her labour became more complex, with key decisions and risks not clearly explained as events unfolded.
After being told labour would likely progress naturally following induction, she was instead put on a drip due to emerging concerns, something she says she did not fully understand at the time.
As the hours passed, the pain became overwhelming, leaving her feeling disoriented and, at times, unaware of what was happening around her. She said attempts to monitor her baby became increasingly difficult, while her own condition fluctuated, adding to the sense that things were not progressing as expected.
Unable to eat due to the risk of emergency surgery, she became increasingly exhausted. Eventually, after hours of labour, she said she reached her breaking point and asked for a caesarean section, feeling she could not continue.
"It got to a stage where I just said I need to have a C-section, which wouldn't have been anything that would have ever come out of my mouth before I wanted to have this child naturally...
"There was no kind of, this is her birth plan, you know, there was no checking in. But at that point, it wasn't an emergency. It so should have been looked at. And the pressure was then on to continue doing that, which I think fed into a lot of my postpartum mental health issues."
"It was absolutely terrifying. I genuinely thought like that was it, I was going to die from it.
"Just from the way the medical world explains it to somebody with a higher BMI. You get it in your head that I could potentially die from this. I'm going to either leave a baby or the baby doesn't survive."
However, she was clear about where responsibility lies.
“The staff were brilliant,” she said.
“They’re working in a broken system.”
That distinction, between frontline care and wider systemic pressures, has been echoed in national reviews into maternity services.
“The whole family gets affected by birth trauma.”
Melanie described how the experience has had a lasting emotional impact, particularly when thinking about the future.
"i would say probably up until a few months ago, I did have a lot of anxieties towards labour, birth, pregnancy, anything to do with it, I just wouldn't talk about...
"I used to sit and sit and look over my daughter every 20 minutes, like round the clock, 24 hours, just check her for like 30 seconds to make sure she was alive and breathing, and then I go back to bed, and it was a constant for a few weeks.
"So at about four weeks postpartum, I started doing the talk and therapies to try and kind of understand what was going on, and they had said I had quite a high grade PTSD."
“I remember sitting there at that time thinking, you won’t be seeing me again in this hospital. I am having no more children,” she said.
“Now I would love to have another child, but the thought of going through all of that again fills me with such dread that it almost ruins the whole process.”
She also highlighted how birth trauma extends beyond the individual.
“The whole family gets affected by birth trauma.”
She said partners and relatives are often left processing the experience alongside the mother, something she feels is not always fully recognised.
A wider national picture
Melanie’s experience reflects concerns raised by MPs during a Westminster debate this week.
Figures cited during proceedings suggest:
Around one in three women describe birth as traumatic
Between 4–5% develop post-traumatic stress disorder
MPs from across parties pointed to repeated findings that women often feel dismissed, ignored or not listened to during maternity care.
In some cases, they said, this has led to serious, and avoidable, harm.
The Government has commissioned an independent investigation into maternity and neonatal care, with recommendations expected later this year. There are currently no confirmed plans to introduce a maternity commissioner.
“I lost 3.5 litres of blood”
Other mothers have shared similar experiences.
Rosie Margarson, who gave birth to twins seven months ago, said she developed severe pre-eclampsia but felt her condition was not acted on quickly enough.
Her planned caesarean section was delayed, before she later suffered a serious haemorrhage.
“I haemorrhaged three times before they finally took me back into surgery,” she said.
“I lost 3.5 litres of blood and didn’t see my babies for two days because I couldn’t stand.”
Her experience has since been raised with her local MP.
Long-term impact
MPs warned the effects of traumatic births can extend far beyond delivery, affecting mental health, relationships and future family planning.
Some women told Parliament they had been unable to return to work, while others described long-term psychological trauma.
There are also wider pressures on families, with partners often taking on additional emotional and practical responsibilities.
Calls for change and accountability
Across Parliament, there was broad agreement that while many NHS staff provide high-quality care, systemic issues remain.
These include:
- staffing pressures
- inconsistent standards between trusts
- concerns around communication and patient voice
More than 700 recommendations have been made in previous maternity reviews — prompting concern that progress has been too slow.
Campaigners argue that national leadership, such as a maternity commissioner, could help drive consistent improvements.
Melanie says she want's some elected who understands the impact these experiences have.
"I think they need to be someone who really and truly wants to work for the family... and you need to think of the family as a whole if you want to change this because yes, there are mums who are going through this on their own and they, of all people, need extra support left, right and centre. But for the dads that are involved, they need to be supported and need to understand everything that goes with this and what may be going on."
East Suffolk and North Essex NHS Trust comments.
Catherine Morgan is the Chief Nurse at East Suffolk and North Essex NHS Foundation Trust (ESNEFT). She said: “We believe every patient and their family should feel informed, supported and listened to throughout their maternity care.
"We recognise good clinical care must be matched by clear, timely communication, especially during induction, when discussing pain management and emergency situations such as an unplanned caesarean section.
"Providing support through complex and emergency births is a key priority. Our teams are trained to involve patients in decisions about their care and explain what is happening at each stage of labour, even when circumstances change quickly. We know there are times when we need to do better, and we're continuing to strengthen how we communicate during these critical moments.
"We are working on a specific programme to enhance the ways in which people using our services can prepare for what may happen during birth, share their experiences following birth and use that feedback to inform the way we develop our services in the future.
“As always, we welcome feedback from patients and families regarding their care, and our dedicated Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) team is happy to listen to concerns raised by the patient or their family and liaise with their clinical team.”