Witney dad says looking after his daughter after losing his wife helped with grief
Richard Baish welcomes the new right to parental leave for bereaved partners so they can look after their babies too
A dad from Witney, who lost his wife shortly after the birth of their daughter in 2022, shared how caring for his children helped him during that difficult time.
Richard Baish spoke about the impact of bonding with his daughter in the early months of her life and how the forthcoming Bereaved Partner’s Paternity Leave could have made a difference to his experience.
The law, which comes into effect in April, will allow fathers and partners who lose their partner before their child’s first birthday to take up to 52 weeks off work.
Richard said this is “one less huge worry” for parents who face similar situations to him, and he only wishes it came sooner.
Aside from the significant emotional implications of losing a partner, Richard said: “There were so many things practically you have to think about and one of them, which was probably the trickiest thing to work around with my boss, was being able to be off and have that financial security.”
Despite the difficulties in managing work, Richard was still able to look after his daughter, which he said was fundamental to coping after the loss of his wife.
“As much as I was looking after her - feeding her, changing her nappies, keeping her safe - she helped me just as much,” Richard said. “My accomplishment in those early days was keeping my children safe, healthy, and happy.
“That kept me going mentally.”
He explained that spending time with your child straight away is crucial to developing a relationship and believes the previous system, where bereaved partners depended on their employer’s discretion to take time off, was unfair.
“All the research has shown that the more someone's with their child in the early days, the more of a lifelong bond they have,” Richard said. “It's absolutely vital for a parent to have that one-to-one with their children at that age, but it's just as important that bereaved have that interaction.”
Richard also feels his bond with his daughter has only been strengthened by the circumstances they shared.
“I do like to think that because of what we've been through, I'll always have that extra special bond with my daughter. It was like a symbiotic relationship that we were there for each other and we helped each other out.”